Sunday, July 05, 2009

Alif

I might love but I'm not beholden to it anymore. I can't apologize for what I feel. How do I know that God loves me? I just have to keep on hoping and believing. Perhaps I don't even care. Perhaps I just want to love Him in the best possible way.

Perhaps I have moved beyond men & women and just want to look at mankind.

Do I need what I gave away freely? Was love not given with an open heart? When you give, aren't you supposed to forget? Why would you keep a tab on feelings? How can anybody?

I am just looking into myself and finding myself happy without being sorry that I loved or for whatever I gave. I love but it doesn't matter who or what.

It just is.

I just am. Alif.

Some couplets by Bulleh Shah from a song by Sayein Zahoor & Noori

Parh parh ilam te fazil hoya
Wei kade apne aap noun parhya nayein
Bhaj bhaj warrna aen mandar maseeti
Wei kade mann apne wiche warrya nayein

(Learning all that knowledge has made you wise
Oh but you never have the time to read yourself
You run entering your temple and mosque
Oh but you have never entered your heart)

Larna roz shaitan de naal
Wei kade nafs apne naal larya nayein
Bulleh Shah asmani udd diyan phharro nayein
Je jeira ghar bheitya onoun phharrya nayein

(Quarrelling with the devil every day
Oh but you never fought your ego
Bulleh Shah stop trying to catch the ones that fly in the sky
You never caught the one who sits at home)

Basein karyoo yaar
Ilmoun basein karein oh yaar

(Stop it my friend
Stop this (so-called) learning my friend)

Ikoo Alaf tere darkar
Haq!
Basein karyoo yaar
Ilmoun basein karein oh yaar

(You only need one Alif (the first letter of the Semitic (Arabic, Hebrew and probably Aramaic?) and Urdu languages)
Haq! (righteousness/right)
Stop it my friend
Stop this (so-called) learning my friend)

Allah!
Sayeinyan!

(Allah!
Lord!)

Nein mein jana jogi de naal

(I want to go with the jogi (wandering ascetic))

Jo na jane haq ki takat
Rabb na de vei oss ko himmat

(He who doesn't know the power of right
God does not give him strength)

Hum mann ke darya mein doobay
Kaisi nayya kya manjhdhar

(I have drowned in the river of my heart
Who needs a boat, (getting lost) midstream does not scare me)

Haq!

(Right/Righteousness)

Bas karein ho yaar
Ilmoun bas karein ho yaar

(Stop it my friend
Stop this (so-called) learning my friend)

Allah!
Sayeinyan!

(Allah!
Lord!)

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