Friday, October 31, 2008


Happy Hallowe'en!

I'm missing last year when the best thing I got was mooning from a 10 year old for Halloween.

I was sitting at my desk, most probably playing a game and feeling lonely on the evening of 31st October, when I hear this bell at the kitchen door first and loud knocks on my window after that. At first I thought its my friend but she's such a scaredy cat, she just didn't get out after dark.

I push back the curtain and see these three boys ranging from 13-9 years. I'd seen at least one of them around the neighborhood on the way to the university and I always wondered why they were never at school. Nonetheless, at first I was surprised but then I thought it was most probably for trick or treating.

Just as I was thinking what exactly I could give these kids, one of them puts his back to the window and viola! lowers his pants and I see a pair of sickly white and red butt cheeks. Well, I couldn't say I've ever had such a halloween scare. Ever. Promise!

I wanted to laugh but seeing as they were just kids, I got a bit worried on their behalf and felt angry at their parents. I got angrier when they started beating the window really very hard with their fists and I thought ok, don't break it or I'll be whooping that ass pretty soon. Seeing as they weren't listening and I wasn't having a very hard time imagining the broken glass and our landlady's reaction, I picked up my cell phone and yelled, you go home or I'm going to call the police now!

Don't go all up in arms because it was just a joke. I pretended to dial 999 (British equivalent of 911) but knowing kids especially boys that age (I have a 13 year old brother so I should know), I knew they weren't taking me seriously. So there I went in my kiddy mode and said, wait until I bring the police to your house, I know where you live and I put on my worst face (my dragon face according to my second sister, another story for another time).

Suddenly the oldest of them just froze, the second one was like no she's kidding but I knew at least one of them had recognized me from my travels from the university to back home. Seeing the reaction, I said, don't worry, when I bring the Police, you'll know. By now, they'd also had a good look at my face and taking me seriously, they made a run for it.

So that was my trick and treat for last Halloween.

I needed to get this off my chest this Halloween because I'm still alone but worst of all I'm not there, where at least I had freedom.

I've this really bad sweet tooth right now, which just can't be satisfied, seeing as I don't have any candy.

But, worse than anything, I'll trade this for those moments. I'll trade this lonliness for that one any day. Sheesh, I still want candy. Gee, I'd even let those kids break the window, if only I could go back and stay.

In the end, it's just a question again of why I came back. I made a mistake when I left but I made the worst one when I came back. It's not like I don't like Pakistan, I do but I love my freedom most.

I had freedom and now it's gone. I miss it. I miss Halloween. I miss the late night wanderings and musings.

I miss myself.

1 comment:

Tuishimi said...

Your entries are so sad, you are breaking my heart.

I wish there was something I could do for you.